Posted by: fireweaver | January 14, 2007

who needs a doctorate?

when you have stripper shoes?

to add to the endless list of fun things that Diana’s made me do, we started working on our career changes today.  i called her up earlier this week to see if she felt like making the lush rounds (there are 3 little wine stores in our general area, ALL of which do tastings on saturday.  it’s kinda deadly) with me during our long weekend.  well, there was already a plan in place for saturday:  her sister had heard from a friend about this place called xpose fitness, and they wanted to go check out the free intro class, and did i want to go with?   well, my friends, how on earth can you say no to pole dancing instruction?  yes, to the great amusement of me, my mother, and pretty much everyone else i’ve told this tale to, we 3 trooped off to aerobicize our inner hookers.  following a butt-grinding workout that kicked all our little asses (including our pair of slender pilates’d twins as much as my obviously couch-potato’d self), the hottie-but-not-intimidating instructor chickie proceeded to demo the moves that get taught in chair class – as in, yes, cabaret dancing with a caneback chair – and then on into the pole room.  this place has a separate room that’s filled with 30ish evenly spaced shiny brass poles, which i was informed, are so securely mounted floor & ceiling that they don’t have a weight limit.  blonde miss thang then showed off intro pole (same stuff as floor & chair, only with pole as prop), pole level 1 (some basic spins & whatnot), and finally supreme hooker goddess aka pole 2.  this chick hauled herself straight up that thing to the ceiling, hooked one leg around, and twirled down slowly to the floor with hands & the other leg flagged out to the side.  easily far more impressive than any mere butch bodybuilding personal trainer.  none of us saw a single girl slip out the door after the whole event, everybody signed up for classes.  it’s all a pay-as-you-go per-class thing, so no sign up fees or monthly membership snafus.  Di & Mel went with the classes & shoes package (oh, yeah, that too:  apparently, you get a more intense workout if you’re balancing all your weight forward and streching those calves…by wearing 6″ stripper shoes), me being a cheap bastard got just classes and opted to score some clearance $12 payless stripper shoes.

i’ll let everyone know when we finally abandon our day jobs to writhe around scantily clad in piles of benjamins.



  1. Oh!!!!!!!!!!!!The hilarity hurts my belly!

    I love it!!! But then, I would. My former roomie is queen of the pole tricks at her club, let me know if you want the steps to her latest body-bending thriller.

  2. OOOo I wish I lived closer ! I would SO go with you. A class like that is something you just have to do with friends so as not to take it entirely too seriously.

    I think buying the proper shoes sounds kinda like a ploy to get more money.

  3. I am so jealous of those shoes (because they are ho-tastic) that I went to Payless. Alas, they had none at mine.

  4. Christine–
    my recommendation is that if you dont intend to take the class seriously you shouldn’t take it at all. Pole dancing is a rather extreme way of getting fit while having fun, and is not all about strip clubs anymore. But it is also dangerous when not taken seriously, and people get hurt. I strongly recommend taking classes, there is a lot to gain from them, but take them seriously or else you’ll only wasting your money and your instructors time.

    Also on another note, I would like to add the pole dancing is making its way into the mainstream, and is leaving behind its old reputation. Professional pole dancing is not affiliated with “strippers” or “hookers”, rather it is affiliated with fitness and artistic dance style.
    Good luck with your classes ladies! Enjoy!

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