Chris called from work to check up on me friday evening. he’s been nothing but wonderful this whole time – from sickness to sadness – and it warms my heart; it’s easy to be great when the sun is shining and all is right in the world, but the true measure of a partner (or of any human being) is how things go when the chips are down. i told him i was alright, that i was taking a whole hell of a lot of “me” time, and as i was looking for the right descriptor word, he said, “sure, sure, you’re just taking some time to be indulgent.” and yeah, that’s about it.
friday, i got an email notice from the library that this month’s “1001 books” club novel had finally arrived. i had just enough time to pick it up from the library before they closed, so that evening found me draped over the couch, dining on finger-foods while reclining roman-style, drinking champagne while reading bret easton ellis. saturday, i went out and had my nails done, and had them paint little silver & white flowers on my big toes while i was at it. then i was off to a late lunch of sushi with a handful of friends, and back home for a few rounds of lazy computer games and a few more chapters. today, Chris proposes to catch a couple of movies (‘wall-e’, ‘hellboy’?), and loafing in a dark theater for a few hours is about the speed i’m up to.
so i’m still shifting at noises i hear in the house, thinking ‘oh, i should go check on the dog’, when it’s clearly just the place settling a bit. and it’s very odd to run around town without making occasional pit-stops at home – i keep feeling like i’m forgetting something because i don’t need to come back to the house to let her out. i’m sure i’ll keep feeling that vague unease for a good long while. everyone has been so kind – thanks guys, i appreciate the support a lot. i’ll just continue to indulge in a little self-pampering for a while, since it’s overall more pleasant than self-pity, but i’m doing alright, and things are going to be ok.