Posted by: fireweaver | July 13, 2008

self-indulgence

Chris called from work to check up on me friday evening.  he’s been nothing but wonderful this whole time – from sickness to sadness – and it warms my heart; it’s easy to be great when the sun is shining and all is right in the world, but the true measure of a partner (or of any human being) is how things go when the chips are down.  i told him i was alright, that i was taking a whole hell of a lot of “me” time, and as i was looking for the right descriptor word, he said, “sure, sure, you’re just taking some time to be indulgent.”  and yeah, that’s about it.

friday, i got an email notice from the library that this month’s “1001 books” club novel had finally arrived.  i had just enough time to pick it up from the library before they closed, so that evening found me draped over the couch, dining on finger-foods while reclining roman-style, drinking champagne while reading bret easton ellis.  saturday, i went out and had my nails done, and had them paint little silver & white flowers on my big toes while i was at it.  then i was off to a late lunch of sushi with a handful of friends, and back home for a few rounds of lazy computer games and a few more chapters.  today, Chris proposes to catch a couple of movies (‘wall-e’, ‘hellboy’?), and loafing in a dark theater for a few hours is about the speed i’m up to.

so i’m still shifting at noises i hear in the house, thinking ‘oh, i should go check on the dog’, when it’s clearly just the place settling a bit.  and it’s very odd to run around town without making occasional pit-stops at home – i keep feeling like i’m forgetting something because i don’t need to come back to the house to let her out.  i’m sure i’ll keep feeling that vague unease for a good long while.  everyone has been so kind – thanks guys, i appreciate the support a lot.  i’ll just continue to indulge in a little self-pampering for a while, since it’s overall more pleasant than self-pity, but i’m doing alright, and things are going to be ok.

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Responses

  1. My 1001 book is in transit to my local library branch, as well. Once we’ve both finished it we’ll have to discuss. I’m still on the waiting list for June’s book (Choke) as well.

  2. […] – bookmarked by 2 members originally found by BarryRabkin on 2008-11-12 self-indulgence https://fireweaver.wordpress.com/2008/07/13/self-indulgence/ – bookmarked by 5 members originally […]


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